Yesterday I presented hardcore evidence that 9/11 was inside job (big-time) exclusively via my Twitter feed. Obam knew, and you should too.
This video was posted on Deadspin today in relation to a proposal to sack the PAT in pro football. (Sack, get it? Hot football on football wordplay action!) And oh boy had I forgotten about this sequence and all its sporting majesty. It will always be stuff like this which makes American Football forever my favorite sport despite the barbarism, corporate greed and general idiocy of watching adults prance around in costumes.
My new #startup beemovietweets.com isn’t totally done yet but you can come in and look around while we continue to make renovations. Thank you! 🌠
For the one billionth time I am rebooting my podcast. When I first tried to podcast I swear it must have been 2006. I want to say I am good at foreseeing trends in popular culture but that would overshadow my most impressive trait: failing. But, whatever. At 11:45PM EST you will be able to find me live on your internet via this link: bit.ly/VernLive. The archives bitly is the same: bit.ly/VernPod. The show will be on iTunes later Thursday mornings, and on my Soundcloud shortly after the show ends. So that is that. I will play music and talk about my teeth. I’d love it if you tuned in. If you’d like to be interviewed for a pre-recorded segment, please email me at vernonhowl-at-gmail or tweet me @vernonhowl. Thanks.
(PLEASE NOTE: There will be limited new content available starting New Years Day 2014 at musicmag.info but the full frontal reboot will begin Monday the 14th.)
Wow now this is the end. This series of posts is borderline absurd if not outright absurd. I’m trying to remember everything I can possibly remember. There is so much. Anybody I forgot I’m very truly sorry. However I am at the end of the list now. Technically I could have done this in four parts but that starts getting pretty hard to schedule the posts just right. So instead I did this. Enjoy!
Strongest Executed Concept – Alcoholics Anonymous by Vernon Howl – Wow I remember how long it took me to get through the entire concept. Multiple levels of humor were used for this: macros, video, speaking, pretend backstories, everything. I liked how everything built off of this overall all-encompassing structure. Anybody who wants to get truly lost in a project, like give up to the deep strangeness of good internet artwork, should check it out.
Cutest Alt Lit Couple (that I’ve met in real life) – Moon Temple and Theo Thimo
Cutest Alt Lit Couple (that I’ve not met in real life) – Blare Coughlin and Bijan Maxim Pakdel
Best Collection of Videos dedicated to a Single Book – Juliet Escoria – Her videos are works of art in and of themselves. I feel like I could not possibly anticipate a book any more than her book. As a nice bonus she picks the best songs for the videos too. If I ever wanted to make a video trailer for anything I’d look at her work very carefully.
Best Short Film – Baseball by Adam Humphreys and Zachary German – I liked it.
Most Nihilistic Horse – Horse Nihilist
Most Divisive Reveal – Horse_ebooks – Lots of people were divided by the revelation of Horse_ebooks.
Best use of a Teddy Bear in a story - Rosé Pacult – Such a sad use of a teddy bear, poor teddy.
Best use of an unsuccessful pickup line for a collection – Fuck Me by Luming Hao – the collection is really good too.
Best Facebook Group – E. O. E. – Apparently this was named after a schism with another group that I never knew about. Whatever the reason it provides a nice safe zone on the Internet. I like it quite a bit. This is my favorite Facebook group. I hope it never stops.
Greatest Digital Film Group – Raccoonsarenotafraidofpeople – I think I have seen countless videos from these guys. They always manage to completely blow me away. Watching their movies is like entering another dimension, a much weirder one full of over-saturation of media. Anyone who watches their stuff should just surrender themselves to whatever is going on. Raccoonsarenotafraidofpeople are a real treat for the eyes.
Best Chapbook (Male) – Riverwalkers by Dave Wright – I like Dave Wright’s work a lot. What he manages to do is take me outside this extremely digital world I live in and remind me that the nature is out there. This is no mean feat and he does it nicely. Anybody ought to check his work out.
Best Chapbook (Female) – obliterate the following items from the beginning of time by Thais Benoit - Yes this chapbook had some of the single most satisfying moments I could have possibly asked for in a chapbook. Some of the lines are so perfect I want to print them out and scotch tape them to my walls. NAP offers the PDF for free which is a real steal in my opinion.
Best Epic - The Mythology of Invention by Dan DeMarse is amazing. It needs to be taken all in one sitting. Anybody who thinks Alt Lit or online writing in general is lazy ought to see this. Incredibly well thought out, meticulous, and pitch-perfect, this is an example of how good writing can get.
Most Promising New Writer – Blare Coughlin – She came out with some of my favorite chapbooks from 2013. Currently she is working on a pupa series that is fantastic. They are wonderful pieces and I hope to see more from her. Yes she was active in 2012 but in 2013 she really stepped things up. I feel that her work is something I’d like to see more of in general.
Weirdest Tumblr – The Same Picture of Dave Coultier Every Day
Best Person to Hang Out with – Eric Nelson – Eric Nelson makes it to nearly everything. He writes furiously and hosts various readings wherever he is basically. He’s a good person who works in the background for a lot of different reading events and overall is a great person to spend some time with.
Best Facebook Presence – RARE TIE - Drew Boston/Gilbert Morgan – This is a tie. I spend a lot of time on both of their profiles for totally different reasons. Anybody who wants to see how Facebook should be used ought to check out both of these wonderfully weird individuals. Hopefully each one of them continues to be my friend on Facebook.
Best Story – April by Codi Suzanne Oliver and Willow Healey – ‘April’ is one of the best damned things I’ve read all year. I wish more stories were this excellent. I am really excited by both of these writers and hope they continue putting out more work in 2014.
Best SELFIE Game - Rachel ‘Pattycake’ Bell - Ah yes who can ever forget the lovely SELFIE game of Rachel ‘Pattycake’ Bell. Rachel ‘Pattycake’ Bell owns the SELFIE game and rents it out to everybody else.
Thus concludes the Beachies for 2013. What a year I had. I am glad I was able to share my year with the Internet. Hopefully the Beach Sloth project is able to continue endlessly, accumulating small victories along the way.
The future is now… coming January 1st, 2014.
Sup fools! My latest ebook has been published by Cyclist endanger motorists™ press!! So psyched for this one you have no idea. The ebook cover designer (Hans Stramnagle) put an “E” on the ebook cover so you know it’s not a real book but an ebook (electronic). You can download that shit by clicking the cover.